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fixit wrote:Is it possible that there is little link between being involuntarily single and appearance?
Its not just possible....its not just probable...its CERTAIN. There's THREE types of involuntarily single people: 1) men who dont approach women 2) men who are too ugly to get ANY female <---- me 3) people with unrealistic standards I have NEVER met a cute guy that can't get girls. I've meet cute guys who only get ugly/fat girls....but none that fail to get girls at all.
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yatterman1 wrote:ITT: Denton owns barbiegirl the man-hater. This post does not add in any way to the ongoing discussion. Please do not start name-calling.
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Anyway back to the subject of speed dating. My experience with speed dating further proved to me its my looks and not my personality.
Almost every girl I talked to there pretty much gave me "fuck off" signals right at the get-go...before the coversation could even start. They would just ignore me....look around...shrug...etc. Then I would observe whatthey would do with cute guys and it was a complete 180...they would be all into the conversation and fall all over the guy LOL!
Lots girls would even just skip talking with me all together!!
But yeah speed dating sucks for ugly guys. I've met soooo many ugly, fat, and or bald men who have experienced the EXACT same thing with speed dating.
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I agree with Denton that the East coast of the US is hard environment for dating. The people who are perpetually single (in my experience) are single because of, 1.) they want to be or 2.) they have really strict standard for what they are looking for (ie must be tall(women)or must be within a certain age range(men). I live in the Southwest and I have to say that it is not as bad here.
I am not tall or very good looking but I dance well and play music, and have emotional intelligence. Music holds an emotional pull over both genders but I have to say most quality girls I have dated, I met because I could dance or play music.
As far as your speed dating experience cindy, I don't know anything bout speed dating but sometimes thing really work out in your favor and sometimes they are a complete bust. Try again to see if your experience was a fluke or the norm.
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adas1 wrote:I agree with Denton that the East coast of the US is hard environment for dating. The people who are perpetually single (in my experience) are single because of, 1.) they want to be or 2.) they have really strict standard for what they are looking for (ie must be tall(women)or must be within a certain age range(men). I live in the Southwest and I have to say that it is not as bad here.
I am not tall or very good looking but I dance well and play music, and have emotional intelligence. Music holds an emotional pull over both genders but I have to say most quality girls I have dated, I met because I could dance or play music. I know a guy who's ugly but he can dance, sing fairly well (made it to round two of american idol a few years back), AND he plays the piano. He's 25 and only had one girlfriend and it lasted like a week before she dumped him for a better looking guy. He's not even THAT ugly ....just like a 3/10.
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adas1 wrote:I agree with Denton that the East coast of the US is hard environment for dating. Well...the east coast SHOULD be the best place for males. It has the best female to male ratio. The west has the WORST...its like 1.3 males to every female or something....in some small towns in Utah its THREE TO ONE. Alaska is obviously the worst. From what I saw in Cali...its worse than the east coast...like I saw fat ugly women with good looking guys ALL OVER THE PLACE. I can't speak for the south west though (at least not from experience)...never spent a significant amount of time in that area....but I DO know that it has a HORRIBLE male to female ratio. JD is from Arizona (the heart of the south west) and he can't get girls because of his looks ether.
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Denton wrote:
I agree with a lot of what you're saying, it's just that I see the least attractive you describe above as being more within the female sex, than amongst males. the males I know that are avarage, unless there is a religous connection - Jewish, Sikh, Muslim, don't have a lot of dating options.I am not including rich or celebrities in this equation.
I guess we all see what is around us.
Actually it is a pretty even split, and their partners are on about the same level of attractiveness. It's not like they are deformed or had a third eye or something; but they are not beautiful. My chronically single friends, who are beautiful, sweet, smart, funny etc (note the more average looking friends are all of these things too) are never approached, even though they should have no problems finding a date. One would think that a very attractive person would be bombarded with potantial mates, however this really does not appear to be the case. I know for me, people tell me all the time I am beautiful, however I am often single and rarely ever get apporached by men. I think that has a lot more to do with insecurities than it does anything else. 93% of communication is nonverbal afterall, and we create in our lives and see what we believe to be truth.
"My friends, love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And we’ll change the world."
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yatterman1 wrote:
Well...the east coast SHOULD be the best place for males. It has the best female to male ratio. The west has the WORST...its like 1.3 males to every female or something....in some small towns in Utah its THREE TO ONE. Alaska is obviously the worst.
From what I saw in Cali...its worse than the east coast...like I saw fat ugly women with good looking guys ALL OVER THE PLACE.
I can't speak for the south west though (at least not from experience)...never spent a significant amount of time in that area....but I DO know that it has a HORRIBLE male to female ratio. JD is from Arizona (the heart of the south west) and he can't get girls because of his looks ether.
You have an example for everything. Okay you have probably seen a pic of me then tell how does an average guy like me date attractive to very good looking girls and the only time I am not seeing anyone is when I don't want to? Now I know you haven't seen the girls I have date nor can I post thier pics for privacy reason but to give you an idea of my scale. A young monica bellucci would be a 10 and Alyson Hannigan would a 6-7 depending on tastes. P.s. I guess one thing that could skew it is that I am in college so I am always in contact with a lot of young and attractive girls.
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barbiegirl wrote:
Actually it is a pretty even split, and their partners are on about the same level of attractiveness. It's not like they are deformed or had a third eye or something; but they are not beautiful. My chronically single friends, who are beautiful, sweet, smart, funny etc (note the more average looking friends are all of these things too) are never approached, even though they should have no problems finding a date. One would think that a very attractive person would be bombarded with potantial mates, however this really does not appear to be the case.
I know for me, people tell me all the time I am beautiful, however I am often single and rarely ever get apporached by men. I think that has a lot more to do with insecurities than it does anything else. 93% of communication is nonverbal afterall, and we create in our lives and see what we believe to be truth.
No offense barbie girl but everyone thinks thier single friends are smart, funny, beautiful and have a wonderful personality.
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adas1 wrote:
You have an example for everything. Okay you have probably seen a pic of me then tell how does an average guy like me date attractive to very good looking girls? Now I know you haven't seen the girls I have date nor can I post thier pics for privacy reason but to give you an idea of my scale. A young monica bellucci would be a 10 and Alyson Hannigan would a 6-7 depending on tastes.
I forget what you look like. Post your pic again please. No social/myspace pics.
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No diversity in England. WTF? I am sure someone could give me stats on the 100+ languages spoken in London schools etc etc. Why even theoreticaly would US citizens look any better than any UK citizen? Doesn't make any sense. Maybe your celebs look better?? Like MJ:) Whenever I have been in the US all did notice a lot of FAT people everywhere and that can hide whatever imaginary superior bone structure you might imagine exists:) i am teasing btw. midi wrote:
QFT, sorry this made me laugh its actually so true.
I agree though theres hardly any diversity in england, very few attractive people/men where USA has every single race/culture under the sun = alot to pick from !
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yatterman1 wrote:
I forget what you look like. Post your pic again please. No social/myspace pics.
I might later, I am not really into posting pics. But according to your scale I would probably be a below ave. to average. Definately no masac or that other japanese guy you always post about. Gakct?
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adas1 wrote:
No offense barbie girl but everyone thinks thier single friends are smart, funny, beautiful and have a wonderful personality.
Some of my friends are beautiful, some are not. I am pretty objective when it comes to analyzing someone's personal appearance. I have many objectively physically gorgeous friends, and many who are not.
"My friends, love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And we’ll change the world."
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yatterman1 wrote:As for speed dating...I've been to speed dating events before. In all that I went to the male to female ratio ranged from 2 (males) to 1 (female) to 4 (males) to 1 (female). The last one I went to was when I was back in Jersey and it had like 25 males and 10 females. I've never been to a speed-dating event, but based on what my friends have told me, the organizers get people to sign up in advance to ensure an even gender split, no? yatterman1 wrote:And from what I saw generally speaking most members of both sexes were below average at these events. The women were almost all fat and the men were mostly at least a little ugly. And yet you say in your subsequent comment that the women who rejected you during your "dates" were then paying attention to "cute" guys -- which is it?
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pauluk wrote:No diversity in England. WTF? I am sure someone could give me stats on the 100+ languages spoken in London schools etc etc. Why even theoreticaly would US citizens look any better than any UK citizen? Doesn't make any sense. Maybe your celebs look better?? Like MJ:) Whenever I have been in the US all did notice a lot of FAT people everywhere and that can hide whatever imaginary superior bone structure you might imagine exists:)
i am teasing btw.
I thought midi was from UK, so she would be talking about your celebs not our. MJ wasn't particularly know for this good looks, well actually he was a decent looking black guy as opposed to a very unattractive white woman :-)
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pauluk wrote:No diversity in England. WTF? I am sure someone could give me stats on the 100+ languages spoken in London schools etc etc. Why even theoreticaly would US citizens look any better than any UK citizen? Doesn't make any sense. Maybe your celebs look better?? Like MJ:) Whenever I have been in the US all did notice a lot of FAT people everywhere and that can hide whatever imaginary superior bone structure you might imagine exists:)
i am teasing btw.
I agree with Paul on this, I have been to a few countries in Europe and there are great and not so great looking people everywhere, but FAT people in the U.S........you must be joking ; - )
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Parisienne wrote:
And yet you say in your subsequent comment that the women who rejected you during your "dates" were then paying attention to "cute" guys -- which is it?
I said MOSTLY not ALL. Pay attention to my use of words...."mostly" only entails the majority. In this case I would say about 80 percent of the guys there were below a 5...but there were still a few cute guys. There no paradox in my statements at all...nice try though.
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Thanks, Sue I think we are catching up fast on obesity :( Sue wrote:
I agree with Paul on this, I have been to a few countries in Europe and there are great and not so great looking people everywhere, but FAT people in the U.S........you must be joking ; - )
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Speaking of midi....I bet midi gets hit on like 9999 times a day being a young attractive asian girl in a 98 percent white country (England). Midi is probably just not into white guys (white guys LOVE asian girls..but (most) asian girls dont like white guys). When girls complain of lack of racial diversity it usually means "I dont like white guys and theres not enough asian/black/hispanic guys" Those are the in demand races....white guys are in overstock compared to the demand.
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