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Allow me to pick up where Earl left off. I could see myself "having" kids, but most likely not my own unfortunately. I don't want natural children of mine to deal with the Treacher Collins Syndrome potential. Luckily, I'm relatively mild (still there, but not straight-up disfiguring). Knowing what I've been through socially, emotionally, surgically and financially, as well as what my parents have been through emotionally and financially, I don't wish that on anyone. So I'd be doing my kid a favor not gambling him/her into a livelihood like me and my family has known.
Beyond ugliness, passing hereditary traits and defects down are, in my mind, a very real variable to consider.
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MJ's kids have to endure constant speculation about their parentage and he left them without a dad after ODing on drugs. Is that the 'right way' you mean? garner wrote:[quote=pauluk]eugenics, garner? are you for real? earl's children might be beautiful - and if not they might be wonderful - and if not, if they are ordinary, so what? you would rather they not be born? what about human attributes that have nothing to do with looks? intelligence, creativity.. things that are longer lasting and
I think Michael Jackson did it the right way.
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pauluk wrote:MJ's kids have to endure constant speculation about their parentage and he left them without a dad after ODing on drugs. Is that the 'right way' you mean?
Whoa there m' lady, save your bashing for garner and leave the King of Pop out of it, please.
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pauluk wrote:MJ's kids have to endure constant speculation about their parentage and he left them without a dad after ODing on drugs. Is that the 'right way' you mean?
When Paris was born, Michael was right there with Debbie in the hospital, and literally snatched the baby away, placenta and all. I think if the Daddy is there in the hospital and is ready to love and cradle that placenta-covered baby, then that's what it's all about. People that have gone to the lengths that Jacko and Earl have to change their appearance are obvious candidates for adoption or designer baby. Earl can do what he wants, but it's a form of narcissism that compels people to do it the old-fashioned way. People need to see their reflections in their babies.
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^^^^ I have three biological children and one adopted. My husband and I are not narcissists, nor are we in the *top tier* of what is considered beautiful. Michael Jackson was far from unattractive when he started his journey to look like someone else. He needed psych help, not PS.
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Sue wrote:^^^^
I have three biological children and one adopted. My husband and I are not narcissists, nor are we in the *top tier* of what is considered beautiful. Michael Jackson was far from unattractive when he started his journey to look like someone else. He needed psych help, not PS. Jackson's aesthetic transformation was "pearls before swine." the average American has a "white bread" provincialism that blinds their appreciation of beauty.
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He was a good looking black guy that turned himself into a freak. He needed psych help. Does your Pearls before Swine remark mean you think black people are unattractive?
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Sue wrote:He was a good looking black guy that turned himself into a freak. He needed psych help. Does your Pearls before Swine remark mean you think black people are unattractive? It means that the average American has pedestrian (and bad) taste. You are actually quite vile to shun creative genius like that.
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LOL
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If reproductive sterilization was the only risk of porex implants
s, Earl would have his face stuffed with it by now.
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Can't see myself ever having children, but you don't need to have good looking parents to have good looking children. My brothers God brother has ugly parents, yet as one girl put it " He is very beautiful"
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...Melissa wrote:
The human population is in no danger of dying out if people choose not to reproduce.
(Japan's population of those who are able to work and pay taxes is in danger of dying out, due to low birth rates unless something is done to change it. It's simple mathmatics. Who will keep the economy going when the elderly die out if no births? }
Anato wrote:
But if you can't for some reason have children, there are other ways to be fulfilled in life. Melissa wrote: friendship, family, pet ownership, art, charity, and work.
( isn't this what I was saying? Other ways to be fulfilled in LIFE can be hundreds of ways.)
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Anato wrote: But if you can't for some reason have children, there are other ways to be fulfilled in life. Or if you don't want to. Kids aren't for everyone and that is a valid personal decision too. It is better for both the child and the parents when people who don't want kids (or shouldn't have them) don't.
"My friends, love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And we’ll change the world" Wear a yellow ribbon, March is Endometriosis Awareness Month!
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bump just incase anyone else wanted to contribute and i like this thread :D
prodigiousflames
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Those who want kids should have them and those who don't shouldn't, disregarding any other obstacles.
I have a daughter but always knew I wanted kids. I have to says kids are a blast but my attitude is to take things one day at a time. Its amazing to watch my daughter grow up and from an early age ask intelligent and complex questions.
How any of my kids (or my daughter) looked was never on my or my wife's mind, Actually nothing genetic or health related was ever on my mind and I have both Hepatitis C (caught from a blood transfusion when I was a toddler) and Hemophilia (blood clotting disorder). Hemophilia is genetically transmitted and my daughter is a full fledge carrier. Her sons will have a 50% chance of being afflicted and daughters 50% chance of being carriers. I had 3 sisters that chose not to have kids because of this( or so they say). I never let this have an impact on me although I know it has caused some roller coaster anxiety for my parents whenever I got injured. So really the issue and worry is with the parentsd not your children.
In any regards never ever try to cross a bridge before you get to that bridge.
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I have a 28 year old daughter. It does take a lot of self sacrifice when a child is growing up. It's loving someone (your child) more than you love yourself. You spend your money and your time on your child instead of yourself.
My reward is now that my daughter is an adult she is my friend. We go to the gym together every other day and talk on the phone almost every day. She checks on me if I am sick. She ask my advice if she has a problem. And she has told me many times how sorry she is about being such a pain as a teenager. I couldn't imagine growing old without her.
Oh, but I'm glad she hasn't made me a grandmother.
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I think ifi it happens it happens. There is no right or wrong time. For me, since it happened this way, I am glad I had my kids young. In some ways maybe I would have done things better if I had been older and more mature. Who knows...what matters is that no matter when it happens, if it happens, you adjust. There is no perfect time.
I adore my kids, and they still bring me joy through their lives and accomplishments. However, one of the most selfLESS acts in humanity is choosing not to have kids if you don't feel that is the life path you want to take. There is nothing wrong with choosing not to have kids, and I commend those who are self aware enough to realize this about themselves and don't cave to some kind of misguided pressure.
My good friend and made of honor all those 28 years ago is a school teacher and she loves kids. She and her husband never wanted their own though. They have a happy, fun fill life of travel and living it up. They are crazy about each other. Why not? No guilt there, they just don't want their own kids! She knew it long before marrying.
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I want kids. Not for quite some time, obvo, but I do want them. I'd rather adopt than biologically reproduce (though, the act that leads to conception is great fun). I don't want to adopt out of a dislike/hatred of my appearance like others here, but, rather, bringing children into the world seems wrong to me when there are already sooo many children worldwide who don't have parents. There children out there who need love and families -- they are the children I want. I kind of like the idea of a big family, too. It saddens me when I hear about people going through expensive fertility treatments and whatnot when there are already existing kids just waiting for a home. Just waiting. :( It seems so selfish to me.
I think it's amazing that you adopted, Sue!
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Homicidal Goat wrote:I want kids. Not for quite some time, obvo, but I do want them. I'd rather adopt than biologically reproduce (though, the act that leads to conception is great fun). I don't want to adopt out of a dislike/hatred of my appearance like others here, but, rather, bringing children into the world seems wrong to me when there are already sooo many children worldwide who don't have parents. There children out there who need love and families -- they are the children I want. I kind of like the idea of a big family, too. It saddens me when I hear about people going through expensive fertility treatments and whatnot when there are already existing kids just waiting for a home. Just waiting. :( It seems so selfish to me.
I think it's amazing that you adopted, Sue! thanks HG, but I did it for totally selfish reasons :) After having my last biological daughter, I ended up with a hysterectomy at 26. As I watched my first three growing up (the nerve of them!) I knew I wanted another child. Much different raising a kid today though today than it was back then with the other ones, keeps me on my toes for sure. She is a joy though and I am very lucky!
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Well since you are a Goat, it follows you would have 'kids'. LOL (OK, stupid pun) Homicidal Goat wrote:I want kids. Not for quite some time, obvo, but I do want them. I'd rather adopt than biologically reproduce (though, the act that leads to conception is great fun). I don't want to adopt out of a dislike/hatred of my appearance like others here, but, rather, bringing children into the world seems wrong to me when there are already sooo many children worldwide who don't have parents. There children out there who need love and families -- they are the children I want. I kind of like the idea of a big family, too. It saddens me when I hear about people going through expensive fertility treatments and whatnot when there are already existing kids just waiting for a home. Just waiting. :( It seems so selfish to me.
I think it's amazing that you adopted, Sue!
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